Can divorces be peaceful?

Attorney Yanique Otto

You’re at the end of your marriage, and you want to get a divorce. But everyone has told you that doing so is one of the most draining processes you’ll ever go through in your life; that it’s going take all the money you have, be extremely time consuming, and leave you feeling emotionally drained. Well the truth is, in many circumstances, that would be accurate – but there’s something you should consider that may make it not so.

In Florida, as in most other states, you are allowed to have what is called an “uncontested divorce”. In this process, the paperwork  submitted to the court stipulates you and your spouse is not going to fight about this one – that you’ve agreed to all the terms, and you both just want it to be done.

I always tell my clients that divorce is one of the most devastating processes you will go through in your life. Even as a family attorney that makes a living helping people in these situations, my advise always is – if possible, save your marriage – for more reasons than I can articulate in this very short article. But to the extent that is not possibile, you’ve prayed about it,  gone to counselling, utilized all the resources available to you and there is still no hope, an uncontested divorce should be considered, before the more traditional way of getting a divorce, through litigation. Doing this kind of divorce will help you save in three major areas:

  1. Time: once you provide us with everything we need,  we can usually have your paperwork ready and submitted to the courts within just 2 weeks, and often less.
  2. Money: your court cost will be the same, but attorney’s fees are usually much less when the divorce is uncontested.
  3. Most importantly, this process will likely help save you emotional energy: emotions can rage high in a divorce. You’re facing the end of what you started out thinking would be your “happily ever after”. It may be difficult to sit across the room and actually discuss the issues that need to be resolved in a divorce with someone you feel betrayed or hurt by. One of our goals when working with you is to help you make this process as peaceful as possible, because it doesn’t HAVE to be a war. In fact, we’ve created a division of our law firm devoted specifically to this process, called PeacefulDivorce.com. Visit that website and fill out the “Consultation Page”, for a free case evaluation.

Finally, remember in order to utilize this uncontested process, both parties must agree on ALL issues – which usually means we need to work through how you’re going to divide your assets and liabilities, and how timesharing with the children will be handled, and spousal and child support.  Our qualified attorneys and mediators are ready and willing to help you through this process, and to help make it as peaceful as possible for both you and your partner.

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