– Monique Russell
Imagine that you have been in a work environment for 12 years. You started at an entry-level role and worked up to vice president. You aspire for the senior vice president role, but despite knocking your performance reviews out of the park, you are constantly told you are not ready. You can’t identify where to move because, in this environment, someone would need to leave their position for you to grow.
Does this sound familiar?
This was the scenario of a mother in leadership who didn’t know what to do next, and could not figure out her subsequent move. As a result, her options were to stay settled or choose to leave.
A woman in leadership knows when she is ready to move to the next level. Frequently, she is aware that her succeeding move must accompany next-level skills, but she may not know the skills or beliefs needed. Here are three beliefs needed for mothers in leadership who want to continue to maximize their full potential.
Motherhood is not about biology, it’s about identity
Embrace every role intentionally, and embody a mother in leadership identity that empowers you. Have conversations with others experienced in what you are trying to achieve to assess your options from multiple perspectives. Identify transferable skills of being a mother and woman in leadership to establish a personal and professional development plan.
These skills include:
- Effective Communication
- Delegation
- Project Management
- Emotional Intelligence
- Leading Up and Leading Down
Being a mother in leadership is not a handicap, but a superpower
Develop continuous learning by listening to related podcasts and joining development communities. When joining communities, assess whether the group can help you develop the skills you seek to grow. Only some communities are a great fit for you and your needs. Use a decision-making filter to determine how the community environment can help you grow. If these characteristics are absent, find another one until you discover the right one. Too many times, women give up on community support because they were not a good fit. Try again.
Develop and nurture your support system. Nurturing connections is often an afterthought, but as a mother in leadership, this intentional action is critical to your success. Take time to carve out 15% of your week to proactively reach out to someone, make an introduction, share words of encouragement, or say hello. It’s easy to take the people closest to you for granted, like family, friends, and life partners, because you know that no matter what, they will have your back. However, these people should be high on your nurturing and gratitude list.
Develop a quality sleep regimen. No matter how organized and prepared you are, if you do not get good quality sleep over the long term, you will struggle. Fatigue will cause you to miss appointments, and feel stressed and overwhelmed. That is not a good look for a mother in leadership. Start with a good-quality mattress and pillow. Empty the worries and concerns in your mind before you go to sleep. Take a notepad and write out your concerns to remove them from your mind to the paper, so they will not disrupt your sleep flow. You can even write out the questions you seek answers to, because when your body is resting, your subconscious mind will help you solve the problem while sleeping. You may wake up the following day with a bright idea and the solution to an existing issue.
Develop a good quality skin care system. The skin is the largest organ of your body. It often communicates to us when our internal body systems are experiencing disruption, alerting us to remedy it. For example, anytime one of my sons eats food with dairy, he experiences a rash on his body and has digestive challenges. Pay attention to how your body communicates to you through your skin. Keep this organ healthy with water, fresh fruits and vegetables, protein shakes, and supplements.
Develop and optimize productivity. Because you make many decisions daily, identifying ways to reduce decision fatigue by enhancing time management and productivity is part of a winning formula. The way you optimize your life is unique to you. It doesn’t have to be any complex series of steps. It can simply start with using your tools to their full potential. I remember when I learned that a snooze button in the Gmail interface allowed me to snooze emails until a later date. I was over the moon excited about this new feature! I could clean my inbox and rely on technology to bring back the email when I would be more likely to address it. Optimizing your life can include outsourcing tasks, communicating goals with others, and reducing clutter.
The dullest pencil is better than the sharpest mind
Develop routines for structure and consistency. Years ago, my dentist decided to forgo calling to remind patients about their dentist appointments. This was before he had the technology to automate reminders. He’d have his administrative staff spend most of their day calling clients to remind them of their appointments. When this stopped, he saw an enormous increase in no-shows because people forgot. This caused more chaos, so they started reminding people again. No matter how sharp you believe your mind to be, systems, structure, and routines are essential for you and your family. This can be having a meal together daily or weekly, setting appointments for car maintenance, shopping, travel, or the like. As someone who travels globally for work and play, I need to have a routine for when I travel, where I stay, how I keep myself healthy in other environments, and how I make decisions while traveling. I would be remiss not to discuss the importance of securing mentors and embarking on coaching to strengthen your self-awareness. This allows you to be a mother of integrity and build self-esteem by honoring yourself and being a person of your word.
Monique Russell is a global communications advisor who teaches leaders and teams how to upskill and retain talent through strategic leadership development. Monique leads Clear Communication Solutions – an international training, coaching, and consulting firm that focuses on confidently communicating from the inside out. She is also the author of the Ultimate Speaker’s Guide and the book Intentional Motherhood: Who Said it Would Be Easy, and host of the Bridge to U podcast.
